Overheard on campus

“She could potentially be hot, judging by her mug shot.”
—The Mayo Building

Girl: “Bruno Mars has such a good voice.”
Guy: “Man, I just want to kiss him and hope that I can sing like him.”
—Coffman Union

Guy: “How did you celebrate 4/20?”
Girl: “It’s not a real holiday. It’s fake like St. Patrick’s Day and Easter.”
—Willey Hall

(Talking about a Yahoo! article on white tigers)
Girl 1: “OMG! I totally want a white tiger or lion!”
Girl 2: “Yeah, they’re pretty.”
Girl 1: “OMG! There’s even white leopards!”
Girl 2: (stares) “They’re called snow leopards.”
Girl 1: “Really?!?!”
—Yudof Hall

“You don’t get it dude, I’m on the next wave of irony.”
—Guy at Grizzly Bear concert

“If your nips are hard, your nips are hard. There’s nothing you can do about it.”
—Guy talking to girl Centennial dining hall

“I know things in my mind that are very weird.”
—Guy boasting about his intelligence at McDonald’s in Dinkytown

“They both got fired, so basically all they do is hang out and have sex all day … which is cool, but really?”
—Girl at Coffman Union

Guy: “Why do girls hate facial hair?”
Girl: “ ’Cause it hurts and it’s ugly and it sucks!”
—Appleby Hall

“It’s like choosing between cutting your left ball off or both your balls off.”
— Guy talking about choosing between Chemistry II or Physics III at Tate Lab

“I like to make up words you can’t write down to explain things.”
—Professor at Ferguson Hall

Girl 1: “So for a while I was a self-proclaimed jersey chaser, but now I know like three Bucky Badgers. So I’m thinking that I’m going to switch from jersey chasing to mascot chasing!”
Girl 2: “WHY DO YOU ADMIT TO THESE THINGS!?!”
—The Rec