Bus driver [on bus going to St. Paul]: “Did you see any animals?”
Girl 1: “His sweater is amazing! It looks like a sunset but in reverse!”
Girl 2: “You mean a sunrise?”
Girl 1: “Yeah …”
Guy: “So, we’re doing a ... presentation in our, uh ... science class. Could we have, like, a bunch of condoms?”
CA: “Really? That’s what you’re going with?”
Art student: “I should take knitting classes! It could be, like, a hobby that I could make money off of!”
Guy: “You mean like your major?”
“So did the doctor give you your herpes cream?”
Girl: “We did that one thing, and we were like ‘Oh, that was so hard!’ and then he was like, ‘Alright, now get on your stomachs.’”
—Washington Avenue bridge
Guy: “You can have my wife.”
Professor: “I don’t always remember this equation ... but when I do ...”
Girl [tuning viola]: “Ah! I broke my G-string!”
“Everyone knows the only way to cure a jellyfish sting is to pee on it, duh.”
Professor: “Opiate withdrawal causes spontaneous ejaculation and orgasms ... Well, at least it’s not all bad, right?”
“Have you ever read ‘Savage Love’? It’s like Dr. Date on Viagra!”
Professor: “I’m sure there are more than a few ladies who like to blow stuff up.”
Nominate an exceptional graduating senior for the upcoming Ski-U-Mah Issue!
UMN students have traveled to Florida colleges to collaborate with students on various projects.
When UMN students plan for a vacation, having trip cancellation travel insurance is a worthwhile commodity to check out.
Minneapolis Used Cars
Give back to the Minnesota community with a boat donation at boat4causes.org.
If you have been involved in a car accident call a Philadelphia Car Accident Lawyer for a free consultation.