Overheard around campus

Professor: “Let’s face it: There’s never a shark around when you need one.”

—Blegen Hall

Professor: “I got asked to five proms throughout my junior and senior year. I don’t think it was because they liked me; it was probably because I had a reputation of being loose.”

—Moos Tower

Girl 1: “So, apparently my final is cumulative. I don’t even know what that means!”

Girl 2: “Well, it means ... wait, I don’t know.”

Girl 1: “Let’s Google it! How do you spell that?”

Girl 2: “... I don’t know.”

—Tate Laboratory

Drunk Guy 1: “Don’t do what you just did.”

Drunk Guy 2: “I didn’t do what I just did.”

—Dinkytown

Professor: “I’m not on drugs; it might be dementia.”

—Soil Science building

Professor: “I WANT RUM. GIVE ME RUM!”

—Blegen Hall

Professor: “What are some things that intelligent design proponents might claim are too complex to have been brought about by natural processes?”

Student 1: “The immune system.”

Student 2: “The eye.”

Student 3: “Women.”

—Science Teaching and Student Services building

Professor: “Rabbits are cute. Who’d want to eat a rabbit? I think I’d rather eat the cat.”

—Ruttan Hall

High school girl in Future Farmers of America: “Yeah, I think the award ceremony is in some sort of arena. You know, the hockey one, mariachi arena.”

—St. Paul campus

“From a modern point of view, testing a sword on real body parts would be considered distasteful but is actually a pretty good test since that’s what they’re going to be used for.”

—Smith Hall