Overheard

Guy 1: “I haven’t had sex in, like, a week.”

Guy 2: “Wow. Dry spell?”

Guy 1: “I could have, but I had more important things to do. Like playing WoW [World of Warcraft].”

—Middlebrook Hall

Guy: “I didn’t think when you were telling our class that 50 percent of us would fail that someday I’d be spooning with you.”

—Bierman Field

Boy (looking at the label of something): “Extremely perishable.”

Girl: “So, like, it could start on fire?”

—St. Paul Student Center

Driver 1: “Have a good weekend, Mr. Miagi.”

Driver 2: “You too, Captain America.”

—Over the Campus Connector radio

Girl: “He’s a powerful sneezer. ... It turns me on.”

—Wiley Hall

Guy 1: “Why are you wearing that stupid Kony bracelet?”

Guy 2: “I am wearing this stupid Kony bracelet because I got a BJ out of it. That’s why.”

—Centennial Hall

Professor: “You know, you never really realize how much you love your dog until you go out and meet other people.”

—Anderson Hall

“So one of the McDonald’s servers had to walk me home because I passed out on a table ...”

 —Bierman Field

Girl: “Do you mind if we stop in Folwell quick?”

Girl 2: “Yeah, I’ve always wanted to take my pants off there!”

 —Outside Folwell Hall

Professor: “So, for our last day, I think our TA is planning to bring (does air quotes) “brownies.”

—Ruttan Hall

Girl: “Do you want to know how to say Wisconsin in Chinese?”

Guy: “Sux?”

—Sanford Hall