Overheard around campus

“My final ends at 4 o’clock. I plan to be stoned by 4:05.”

—Coffman Union

Professor: “How boring would that be?! To talk about things that are in no way related to sex?”

—Biology class

Girl: “Girl, why can’t I just find a normal douchebag [to date]?”

—Centennial dining hall

Guy: “Hey, I just got invited to a party in Como!”

Girl: “Where is it?”

Guy: “Mi casa... do you know where that is?”

Girl: “That means the party is at your friend’s house ...”

—Centennial Hall

Guy: “You don’t know who Sonic the Hedgehog is?”

Girl: “No! I’m from Wisconsin!”

—Campus Connector

“Changing my major to geography was one of the best decisions I ever made in college.”

—Washington Avenue Bridge

“If you’re going to steal my credit card, will you at least buy some quality [expletive]? Don’t go to Walmart.”

—Frat row

Girl from PETA: “Do you like animals?”

Girl 2: “Not enough to talk to you.”

—Northrop Mall

Girl: “It’s supposed to be 79 degrees tomorrow! I need to shave!”

—Food Science and Nutrition
building

Girl: “And they were just blasting One Direction at 7:30 this morning! I CANNOT wake up to One Direction and have a good day. It’s just not possible”.

—Science Teaching and Student Services building

Guy 1: “We should go to Chilly Billy’s and get like two pounds of frozen yogurt and eat it until we cry.”

Guy 2: “Alright, let’s go. I’m calling your bluff.”

—Sanford Hall