How do you imagine a red carpet atmosphere? We think of a street in Hollywood right at peak golden-hour, covered in the kind of plushy fabric heels sink into.
Enter the NFL Honors 2018 awards on Saturday afternoon.
This red carpet was located in the University of Minnesota mall. In a tent. At around 3 p.m.
Somehow, it looks like any other of its kind in photographs.
It was hot, and it smelled like it was hot. Our place on the red carpet was somewhere between E! News and the lovely men of NFL Canada’s social media accounts. That golden hour lighting? Huge spotlights angled overhead.
With snow billowing, host Kay Adams had to be carried in so she didn’t sacrifice her shoes. We trudged through the snow without help in our pointy boots (snakeskin and silver).
And though no one asked to take our picture, we can dole out our own awards.
Best glam: Ciara
Walking the carpet with husband Russell Wilson, Ciara wore her locks in twin buns with loose tendrils flowing. Matched with a cherry pout, the blue undertones complemented Wilson’s suit perfectly.
Best suit: Alvin Kamara
We must end the idea that black and brown don’t work well together. They absolutely do! Kamara’s luxe brownish red velvet jacket was intricately patterned and paired with black pants, a black bowtie and a crisp, classic white shirt. Winner!
Best color choice: Dascha Polanco
The “Orange is the New Black” actress wore a sparkling emerald Pascal Millet number. It shone as she walked and somehow reminded us of warmer times while still maintaining winter-chicness.
Best shoes: Tyreek Hill
Multicolored gorgeous and glittery loafers — someone had to ask.
“Where are the shoes from?” “Gucci!”
We probably could’ve guessed.
Nicest: Milo Ventimiglia
There’s a chance of bias thanks to his role on Gilmore Girls as Jess Mariano, but wow — he is so nice! While being photographed, a little kid was waiting to walk past him. Ventimiglia stopped photos to say something like, “Go ahead, bud!” He also held his own glasses and flashed a peace sign.
Best quote: someone with a good idea
When planning the opening of the red carpet TV spot: “It would be cute if you were walking and acted like you wanted to stop and pose,” proving live TV is not real life.
Best transformation: Emma Roberts
After entering the world of red carpet memes last month, Emma Roberts showed up in a shiny black shift with her hair in a nice swoop. No more bad bangs!
Biggest surprise appearance: The Kalers
A true campus celebrity couple! While they weren’t on the list of expected celebrities, the Kalers rocked the red carpet with Karen Kaler’s golden parka tucked neatly under her arm.
Biggest no-show disappointment: Snoop Dogg
Probably tired from his Netflix documentary premiere at St. Anthony Main Theater the night before, Snoop Dogg was nowhere to be found on the red carpet. This is unfortunate, as we were hoping to ask him his favorite Prince song. We love a local tie and college kids love Snoop!
We saw a number of people pick lint off themselves and then ask someone to take a boomerang for them. They also had trouble figuring out where to put their jacket for a photo op and often just bunched it up in the corner. Celebs — they’re just like us!