Network

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Wed, 07/02/2008
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>Networkia,

Isn't summer awful?


From Recycling Radical

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Wed, 06/25/2008
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>

Well, it's become obvious that Networkia is obsessed with eating bugs.

We know that our register isn't exactly A-Z Dean's list, pure bred, intellectual brain flexors, but hopefully we have enough frontal lobe to abstain from snacking on night crawlers.

Bottom of the barrel …


From: Johny meets Carl Linnaeus and the Linnaean Taxonomy

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Wed, 06/18/2008
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>

The school bells are ringing, Networkia - Welcome to summer semester.

We've been on a three-week bender since spring finals and nothing kills a good buzz like sweaty lecture halls and that CLA requirement we forgot to take freshman year.


From: Darwinists_are_dumb

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Wed, 06/11/2008
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>

I won't mince words with you, Networkia. Our once-surging rivers of vacuous rants and musings have been waning to a low and now hauntingly placid trickle. Have you lost your voice? Have you gone completely NUTTing comatose!? What could have I done better? I gave you everything. I read every NUTTing word of every entry and even interjected so you knew I was listening. What's your malfunction? Is there somebody else? Is it that mawkish quack at the bottom of the page? I heard that they're not even a real love doctor; he just got their BA in construction management. How awful.

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Wed, 06/04/2008
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The polls have closed and the tallies are in. The masses of sane Minnesotans are sick of summer and are begging for a second wave of snow storms and hail bombings.

They're getting their wish.


From: boxelderbug

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Wed, 05/28/2008
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>It's summer, ladies and gentlemen. We are the remainder - the ones who didn't go back home to mommy. We buy our own groceries, do our own laundry, and tie our own shoes. So let's keep the ridiculous banter at a steady troll, Networkia. There may only be four of you left, but that's never stopped us before.


From The_Schwans_Man

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Fri, 05/09/2008
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;This is it folks. The last hurrah. The final farewell. The long kiss goodnight. The insert-your-cliché-here. We're done. At least until the summer. But hey, most of you slackers won't be around to read us over the summer, so you won't be seeing us again until fall. Isn't that sad? What are you going to do to fill up your meaningless void of a life? You spent hours consumed with Backtalk this year and now you must return to your woeful small-town home (don't lie … we know you're from a woeful small town).

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Thu, 05/08/2008
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>We can almost smell it, Networkia! No, we're not talking about the St. Paul campus (though, if the wind is blowing just right, the scent of horse s--t is unmistakable). We're talking about summer! Right after getting through Hell's Pass (aka finals), you can all enjoy the sweet sun of the solstice! There's also the pleasure of mosquitoes but, luckily for us, they're not fond of green slime. We just get a hoot out of watching an insect the size of a thumb-tack causing you folks so many problems. And you claim to be on top of the food chain! Ha!

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Wed, 05/07/2008
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>Hump Day, Networkia (keep your mind out of the gutter)! That means only two more days until your semester is over (oh, and then there's the grueling hell that is finals week. We forgot about that). Are you excited? Sad? Wondering what happened to the last 15 weeks because you were so drunk you forgot most of it? In any case, we're glad you're spending your final days with your pals at Network. We hope to entertain you as the meaningless last week of lecture winds down.

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Tue, 05/06/2008
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>We're here to say that we hope you babies FINALLY can stop whining about the weather being so crazy. Yes, the sporadic snow, rain, cold and wind was probably pretty maddening the past few months, but what did you expect? Ever hear of a little thing called global warming? Ever watched "The Day After Tomorrow?" The weather is going nuts, folks. Within a year or two, you can probably expect tornadoes, earthquakes and blizzards to all occur at the same time (and no, Dennis Quaid won't be coming to rescue you). So buckle up.

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