Dear Dr. Date,
You know when you see someone hot at a party and you dramatically lock eyes across the room before going to talk to them? Imagine that person is actually at Dinkytown McDonald's, and you’re both getting dragged out by the security guard for drunken behavior. Yep, that’s how I met my girlfriend — it’s not love unless you’ve brushed hands while yelling at an employee. We both may have been total assholes that night, but we bonded over the ridiculousness of having a security guard at a McDonald's and ended up going out on a few dates. Now, we’re going on six months, and I know she’s the one for me.
I’m so sure in my decision that I’ve already been dreaming up proposal plans — not for the next few years, mind you, but plans nonetheless. My big idea is to recreate the night we first met, with a DrunkDonald's guard dragging us out before he lets me go so I can get down on one knee. Getting proposed to among drunk college students and McChickens, what can be better?
But now, I’m in a panic. I’ve been planning that proposal idea since we started dating assuming that DrunkDon's would always be there. Except some big developer wants to bulldoze the Dinkytown staple (any place The 1975 takes photos in front of is a historical landmark, okay?!) and ruin my life! I’m pretty set on doing it this way, to the point where I’m thinking of proposing in the next few weeks before our special place is demolished forever. However, we have only been dating for six months. Is it worth proposing in a more romantic way earlier or should I give up on my Big Mac dreams?
In a Flurry
Dear In a Flurry,
This is right up there with the letter I got from the couple wanting to recreate their anniversary by having sex in an Applebee’s bathroom. While not my idea of romance, your call? I guess?
While you may be set on the plan, corporations have other ideas, and your girlfriend is probably not super into getting married after only six months of dating. I admire your initiative and determination, but who knows — after you’ve been dating for a few years, you’ll probably know more about what she may want in a proposal. And honestly, it probably won’t be anything like getting dragged out of a McDonald's with someone she’s been dating for only six months. Mourn your losses, write to your city councilperson and don’t worry about popping the question for another few years. P.S. Please don’t have McDonald’s cater your wedding — at least spring for Five Guys?