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By demonizing pleasure, we set ourselves up for unfulfilling sex lives.
Opinion: Let’s talk about sex
Published March 27, 2024

These dogs are more famous than you

Some dogs become more famous than most people.

As it turns out, Wikipedia’s category for famous real dogs provides biographies of canines more rich with detail than will be provided for the human lives of the bulk of this blog post’s audience.

Take Soccer the Dog. Famous for his award-deserving take as the titular Wishbone on the PBS kids show, Soccer is privileged enough to have his exact birthday documented.

There is a surprisingly well-documented lineage of successful canine actors, and author Ken Beck’s Encyclopedia of TV Pets glamorizes Soccer’s world public television fame. In one passage, Soccer’s owner claims that the reading dog “always flew first class,” a perk from the show’s production company.

It’s a struggle not to compare Soccer’s notoriety (and salary) to the tribulations of most wannabe actors today.

Soccer’s silver screen celebrity epitomizes dog stardom, but the list doesn’t end there. Uggie, the Jack Russell terrier in the 2012 film “The Artist,” acted with such penetrating grace and versatility that the former stray is the only dog to have his own paw-imprinted Walk of Fame star.

If you want to act, try becoming a dog.

Not all dogs achieve prominence through screen endeavors. Hachik?’s legacy in loyalty has captivated his native Japan for over 75 years. Hachik?, the former dog of a Japanese professor, faithfully waited for his master each day at a train station for nine years after the professor passed away. Moved by Hachik?’s faithfulness, the dog’s remains were preserved and continue to be displayed by a Japanese science museum today.

Hachik?’s Wikipedia is more extensive than all of these highly important Nobel Laureates.

Some obscure, found recordings of Hachik?’s bark, broadcasted by a Tokyo radio station, paved the way for the (totally nonexistent) Japanese dog-rock revival in 1994.

Similarly, Fido was so loyal to his deceased master that Italy resurrected a bronze statue in the dog’s honor.

Not all dogs go to Wikipedia heaven. Hitler and Eva Braun’s German Shepard Blondi, ever loyal to her duty as First Dog of the Third Reich, died after ingesting a cyanide capsule Hitler was convinced did not work. In the gloom that followed in the bunker, one of Hitler’s nurses claimed that Blondi’s semi-accidental poisoning “affected [Hitler’s team] more than Braun’s suicide.”

Like all dog narratives, this link-a-thon ends with a tearjerker. George, the cutest Jack Russell, gave his life to adorably defend a group of young children from a pair of vicious pit bulls. George gained enough international recognition to inspire a Vietnam US Marine vet to pledge a Purple Heart he earned to the “little warrior” and his New Zealand owner.

All of these dogs have lived completely unaware of their worldwide recognition, and this Internet post serves as another means to make these dogs more famous than you.

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